Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize