he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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