Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
