Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
