How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Alive.
So much puke
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
