i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
one might say we're banned from that church
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize