how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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