ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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