Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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