I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
