She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
