Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize