Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
