We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
