3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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