He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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