Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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