Got a toothbrush?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize