Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
