She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
