know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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