sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize