I think my vagina is haunted
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
