Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize