We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
