new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
