Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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