Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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