She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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