need another drink. this is the easiest way
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
