this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
