They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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