So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize