I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
