Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
