problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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