like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
