hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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