I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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