she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
