I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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