...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize