oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
