You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize