This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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