he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize