The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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