I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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