after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
