What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize