Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
